Love Actually? The Unauthorized Musical Parody

Daniel Hayward (left) channels Liam Neeson and Kayla Catan portrays his young son in Love Actually? The Unauthorized Musical Parody.

Daniel Hayward (left) channels Liam Neeson and Kayla Catan portrays his young son in Love Actually? The Unauthorized Musical Parody.

If ever there was a film that deserved to be satirized, it is the 14 men meet 13 women across 10 subplots glorification of romantic, platonic and familial love known as Love Actually. Why it took 16 years for a work such as Love Actually? The Unauthorized Musical Parody to arrive on the scene is anybody’s guess, but the timing is right in at least one aspect. ’Tis the season when quirky Christmas musicals dot the Off-Broadway landscape, and this one, with its many flings being flung across five weeks of winter, is as full of holiday cheer as it is overflowing with whirlwind performances and witty pop-culture shout-outs.

One need not have seen the movie to appreciate this musical in the way that one need not have a coat on to appreciate a blizzard. So much comes at you so quickly that, for maximum enjoyment, it is best to arrive with a layer or two of understanding as to what is about to unfold. (Fortunately, the flick is currently available on no fewer than a half dozen streaming services.) The writing duo, who go by the fictitious names Bob & Tobly McSmith, have condensed the 136 minute rom-com into a 90-minute downpour of ditties and jokes, while a talented, young and clear-voiced cast of only six, under the breakneck direction of Tim Drucker, sing and yuck it up amid an avalanche of costume changes.

Hayward in Alan Rickman mode, with his secretary (Catan). Photographs by Jeremy Daniel.

Hayward in Alan Rickman mode, with his secretary (Catan). Photographs by Jeremy Daniel.

It would require a flow chart as wide as the web itself to break down the interlinked and mostly inappropriate plotline, but suffice it to say that the British prime minister is in love with one of his assistants, while his sister is in a faltering marriage with the head of a vaguely defined design agency where a secretary keeps hitting on him while two of his co-workers simmer for each other. Meanwhile, a widower helps his very young stepson get a girl, a cuckolded writer finds romance with his housekeeper despite a language barrier, a guy seduces his best friend’s bride, two porn actors find they are intellectually suitable, an aging rock star with a substance-abuse problem has a last hurrah, and a lowly waiter travels to Milwaukee to meet his sexual destiny. Merry Christmas.

The McSmiths operate on at least three different comic levels. Besides parodying the film’s story, they mock the movie itself as a cultural phenomenon, especially in the opening number, where the ensemble proclaims, “It’s a montage movie with celebrities / Rotten Tomatoes score of 63.” And most entertainingly, they make fun of the movie’s many stars, including Keira Knightley, Liam Neeson, Emma Thompson, Colin Firth, Laura Linney, Billy Bob Thornton, Alan Rickman, and especially Hugh Grant.  

Grant, in the role of the prime minister, is at the film’s center, so it is unfortunate that, to an American audience, he is probably the least endearing (and most arrested) among his co-stars. Still, newcomer Eric Peters brings the required charm to the role, then switches to smarm as Colin, that Wisconsin-bound waiter. Sadly missing is an adequate mockery of the Risky Business-esque dance sequence Grant performs in the film. Some moments, apparently, are beyond parody.

Daniel Hayward is terrific as a limited Liam Neeson (“You can do this, Liam Neeson. You have a particular set of skills. And one of those is phone calls,” he tells himself.) and equally hilarious when portraying Alan Rickman in full Professor Snape mode. (Yes, a familiarity with Harry Potter is also helpful.) Kayla Catan kills as Keira Knightley, her eyes growing impossibly large, while Joyah Spangler shows off some great pipes while both attempting to be Emma Thompson and wholly embodying Laura Linney. James Parks brings a pudgy comic edge to his Colin Firth and a host of others while Tony Tilman raps, cross-dresses and entertains mightily despite the lack of a celebrity to impersonate. Or, as he pointedly observes, “I guess only white people find love in 2003.”

An erstwhile Hugh Grant (Eric Peters, left) and Colin Firth (James Parks, center) alongside Tony Tillman (right).

An erstwhile Hugh Grant (Eric Peters, left) and Colin Firth (James Parks, center) alongside Tony Tillman (right).

Just as Love Actually came after a string of like-minded hits for screenwriter Richard Curtis (Four Weddings and a Funeral, Notting Hill, Bridget Jones’s Diary), its parody is one of many cult musicals that the McSmiths have built around popular entertainments. Their past spoofs have been based on TV shows such as Friends, Saved By the Bell and Full House, as well as on the film Showgirls. They had composed their own music as well until their recent The Office! A Musical Parody (playing alongside this production through Jan. 13.) This time, a purportedly real British composer named Basil Winterbottom, with a very suspicious bio in the program, provides a forgettable score for a night that is otherwise actually lovable.

Love Actually? The Unauthorized Musical Parody runs through Jan. 14 at the Jerry Orbach Theater (1627 Broadway). For tickets, information and a complete schedule of varying evening and weekend matinee performance times, visit loveactuallyparody.com. 

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